Friday, October 28, 2011

What Chamberlains Are Supposed to Oft'Times Hard to Say...

A Question of Crating

by Nessie the Monster, Duchess of Hagg

When it comes to my staff; they are all over the place in terms of excellence.  My Chamberlains are absolutely THE WORST Chamberlains any well respected Duchess, such as myself, could ever imagine in their worst of nightmare scenarios.  On the other hand, the staff that they have hired (I cannot tell you how fortunate they are) are without question, the most excellent of servants. The woman who they have hired to do the cooking, washing up, straightening, shopping, chauffeuring, and grooming of we, the Royal House of Hagg, is quite exceptional indeed. She takes care of everything so beautifully that there is NO EARTHLY REASON why the Chamberlains cannot take care of the business of the Bed Chamber (their ONLY duty).

Now.  Let us discuss the bed chamber.  I, being a Royal Blue Blood, have a very ornate and comfortable private room which allows me to relax, rest, take snacks, play games and even entertain (with conversation -- please get your mind out of the ditch) certain other Nobles when I choose.  All I ask of above said Chamberlains is to keep quiet and out of the way while I'm asking for my 'alone' time.  It would be nice if they would clean m'privey every once in a wee while, but they leave that up to that woman they have hired.  Heaven's Forbid if she ever takes another job or even worse the Queen herself, find out about her.  She would be whisked away in a matter of seconds and I would be left with a disaster of a staff to deal with.

Just Take a Look at This Evidence of Their Work

Yes.  Now you see what I'm talking about..............
.................Look.  Everyone deserves their own room.  It's comfortable, cozy, safe and their own.  There is a lot to be said of ownership.  It builds mutual respect and gives us each a private place to get away from the cares of the world.  We learned this, if we follow history, in the Declaration of Arbroath.  We can go back even further and learn about one's ownership rights in the Magna Carta.  And even if you are not a student of history, (remember, you can't know where you're going if you don't know where you've been) you do remember when you got your very own room for the first time.  What a great feeling!

My servant conducted a survey earlier today.Whilst she was attending to hair styles and general beauty treatments of her own, I was happily enjoying my private room.  (I've heard some call this a crate, a cage and also a cruelty but I can't see what they are talking about).  One of my Chamberlains asked and was allowed to join me, the Lady McKenzie.  She also brought with her a favoured toy to see if I wanted to play a game.  Well.  I didn't.  But Lord Malcolm did.  In fact he wanted the very game that Lady McKenzie was all ready engaged in.  They proceeded to commence arguing about it.  So loudly that I couldn't hear my self think, so I lost m'temper and snapped at both of them.  Oh! I say!  Sometimes they just get on my last nerve!  The servant jumped into action and put an end to all the fuss straight away.  She then did an amazing thing.....

She threw all of us out of our own Bed Chamber and locked the door!  None of us were allowed back in!  Well, you can guess that none of us were any too pleased with this situation.  I mean the audacity!  Locking the door to m'own bed chamber!?!   Well.  We all just stood there aghast! We didn't know quite what to do for a moment and then Lord Malcolm, in his typical Boxer and Bull Headed fashion, began banging on the bed chamber door, even though he could see that no one was in there.  He knocked and knocked and knocked and tried to break the door down to get back in.  Oh, yes.  He knew very well that I was none too pleased and that he had better get control of the situation very quickly indeed.  Well, he, in Lord Malcolm style, made such a fuss and such a demand on the servant woman that after about 10 minutes, she repented of her ways and opened the door to us again.  We all rushed in and out and in and out again;  so very happily as to let her know that we were indeed very  grateful to have access to our own room yet again!  After a few minutes more, we all curled up and went to sleep.  We do love our room!

For more on Crates and Crating Dogs Please read this article and feel free to search for the many many more available on the web.

Lady McKenzie at 4-5 months, sitting on her food table while still confined to the kitchen

Lord Malcolm and Lady McKenzie on their very first jeep ride.  The  kennel kept them safe on our journey home

Malcolm and McKenzie snuggled together in the kitchen.  The door to the kennel was always open.  They did not have to sleep in there, but they wanted to.

Older dogs in their bigger kennel (adjoining rooms) in the Master Bed Chamber.  Again, the door is open, they do not have to be there.  They love it and choose to go in and snooze.

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