A 2 Year Old Boxer Boy, A Stressed Out Mom and Agility

Sometimes I wonder why on Earth we do the things we do.  (Any body out there a 'Parrot Head')?  Why would a person put a 2 year old Boxer who is so full of 'vim and vinegar' as Malcolm, into a room with nervous people and dogs, both large and small, running very fast and jumping and people screaming and yelling "yippee" all around the place?  It had to go badly...................................

This is an account of a sporting event Lord Malcolm, m'Chamberlain, endeavored to complete on the week before Thanksgiving, a very stressful holiday.

by Nessie the Monster, Duchess of Hagg

Well I try not to judge.  But when m'Chamberlain, the Lord Malcolm, came to me requesting time away from his duties at House of Hagg (which, I admit, are virtually non-existent) I granted him his leave with the understanding that I was very much amazed that he would place himself in such a situation as to set himself up for grand failure.  Lord Malcolm is quite the Scottish warrior, bull headed type of Boxer who never backs away from a good fight and so, he was very much determined to continue on with this foolish exercise.  ......

.....   The worst part about it was the fact that he was taking my best servant with him.  He laid out a plan to me that relied heavily upon the woman.  It turns out that she has secretly been much involved in this sport herself and in fact, Lord Malcolm considers her as part of his team. (I don't know when they intended to tell me this.) Evidently, he cannot do this agility sport  alone and needs a team member to also be involved.  Well, that's all well and good except for the fact that it was the week before Thanksgiving.  This woman had many, many chores to do!  She needed to clean and make ready the Palace for all of my Noble Guests and she had to prepare a Stately Dinner with all the fine Bone china and silver and crystal stemware.  She was all ready stressed, but instead of preparing, she was at the sporting facility all week!

I do wish m'Chamberlain well and much success at all times, but truth be told, he just wasn't ready.  I was able to have a heart to heart discussion with my servant woman, the Royal Chef, and she told me exactly what had happened.  It seems that as soon as Lord Malcolm entered the facility, he began to be very stressed out.  He expressed this by lunging at a bearded Schnauzer.  He doesn't like Schnauzers since that time at the dog park when 2 ganged up on him.  

(Luckily that day, a pit bull mix came to help him and saved the day by herding them off in another direction)!  And so the stress began..............................Malcolm continued to lunge and pull and even growl, not in a vicious way, mind you, but in a way that said "I really want out of here and at least take me to a quiet corner". (She had wanted to bring the Victoria Stilwell 'Calming' cd but could not find an electrical outlet to plug in the Bose Wave Music System - Titanium Silver ).  He did calm down eventually and made a few friends, but it was over for the servant woman.  She never trusted him after that and found herself in a few unsolicited conversations about how to 'handle' her dog.  Humph!  She didn't take kindly to perfect strangers telling her what she should be doing, especially since it was obvious that they didn't know the breed or the age or the experience of Lord Malcolm.  I do say people!  If you don't fully understand the details, why do you feel the need to put your snout--as it were-- into someone else's business?  They should have just come back to the Palace and all would have been well.

But Lord Malcolm never backs away from a good challenge.  He wanted to go into the ring.  He just couldn't get over that people were clapping for him and didn't want to take his eyes off of them.  He does love his adoring public!  Needless to say, he did not have his eye on the prize, as it were.  He did maybe 3 obstacles before he started running around the ring and hopping and jumping on the judge and just basically welcoming all the people to his parade.   Yes.  He NQ'd.  Four, count 'em, 4 times.  But he did have fun.  It was the servant woman whom he stole from her regular duties at House of Hagg that did not have fun.  She has vowed that she will never do such a thing again and I do think she has learned her lesson.  Perhaps, when Lord Malcolm is 5, we can all reconsider.  Until then, I have ordered that he continue to practice his sport and educate himself in obedience.  He has all ready enrolled in a weave poll class.  Who knows, I may enroll in a class myself!  

Sorry, there are no pictures or videos.  The camera could not find him.  You may look at the video page of this blog to find a couple of videos of his practice agility runs.